A client recently shared her latest success with me and we celebrated this success. We kept on talking and she brought up the possibility of making a mistake the next time a similar situation arose. And my responses went something like this:
"Very true, you could be presented with the same situation and you could make the same better choice or make a not so good choice. That's like "what if ..." scenario for something you don't have all the premises for and you're anticipating the outcome. I recommend waiting until another situation presents itself and then apply the same process you did for this one and then see how it goes. Personally, I "what if ..." in my favor. I believe in "what iffing ..." to support me. When I have a big project that feels daunting and impossible, I what if on the amazing support I will receive so my project is successful. I what if about everything and get so psyched into action. I must confess that sometimes people have told me, "that's wishful thinking" to which I have responded, "well, what the hell do you call your negative what if...? It is wishful thinking that is scaring the bejeezus out of you and keeping you from acting for your own good; at least my wishful thinking is helping me."
And we both burst into laughter. Then she said, "You should write about this on your blog," and so I did.
A while back, I decided to positively anticipate and live in the mindset that everyone and every thing is here to help me. Prior to that decision, I was the biggest drama queen on the largest stage in my mind. I could ruminate and create outright wacky scenarios to no end. If there were ten ways something could go wrong, I could think of 100 ways. But then, I would act, despite the wacky thoughts, and I would yield some or all of the wacked up outcomes I had thought of and be convinced I should not have done anything.
When I began my studies in psychology, I started to psychoanalyze myself. I also realized I was doing effective mental self-talk that will work to support me or hurt me, based on my choice. So I maintained my powerful mental self-talk and changed it to support me. Some people are aware of my "Disaster Report" sheet which I use to "think out loud" and "what if ..." to my heart's content. I called it the disaster report because I used to spin in my mind and freak myself out so much that I would make a mountain out of a mole hill and scare myself. When I decided to put pen to paper with the usual suspects of questions that would cause me to focus on unfavorable things, I felt it deserved the aptly named, "Disaster Report" to reflect how my sometimes too dramatic thoughts show up. At the same time, I created the "Sabotage Report" for the times I realized I was considering all the ways I could mess up. With both of these, I mess up less, I accomplish more and I laugh at my self way more than I did before. They also serve as preliminary think tank of ideas that jump start my positive what iffing.
If you are a "what iffer" and would like to use the disaster report to think out loud and positively what if ..., I have provided it here for you.